I Don’t Want a Gal Pal at My Birth

I’m grunting, I’m groaning, I’m sweating, I’m moaning, I don’t want a Gal-Pal at my birth.

I’m focusing, I’m concentrating, I’m primal, I’m letting loose, A Gal-Pal would only inhibit me.

Natural Childbirth at its core is sheer physical power and force, an intensely private act.

And for me, I would prefer only one other person’s presence – my dear husband.

(“Gal-Pal” refers to a midwife, friend or any woman you invite to your birth.) I’ve noticed that women who have high social needs and enjoy camaraderie with other women prefer having people at their birth. Have you noticed the dozens of photos of a new mom holding her baby, surrounded by midwives? Where’s the father? Is he just a sperm donor and have women shoved men to the background during the birth process? That is often what happens when midwives, coaches, labor assistants and other women partake in the private act of childbirth. It can appear to be some type of female orgy or circus-event. Go read some midwife websites and you’ll see the comments from glowing new mothers talk about how they looked into the midwife’s eyes and felt a compassion and understanding. Why do women need to bond with other women for the birth of their child? I don’t get it.

Although I’m an extrovert, I’m more independent and less of a group person. I’ve never been one to seek out groups of women such as sorority sisters, mom’s groups, Mary Kay parties, etc. I’m definitely more of a “tom-boy” type girl as opposed to a “girlie-girl.” Perhaps my temperament and preferences enable me to embrace unassisted birth. During both of my unassisted births, I felt energy from the spirits of 4-5 unassisted birth friends, whose presence I felt at various times during the final stages of labor.